Lessons from It the clown

In the not so distant past I had the worst nightmare of my life. I woke up from it 3 hours before my alarm was to go off and I was beyond exhausted even after sleeping for several hours. I’ll spare you the minute details but suffice it to say it involved me being murdered twice, losing my current job I have in Iowa, It the clown appearing out of thin air then vanishing, random body parts of mine growing faces and talking to me then detaching from my body and floating away, and multiple hallucinations. I’d never wish that on anyone no matter how much of a terrible person they were. That one dream taught me a lot about myself. That one dream was ironically a wake up call both physically and figuratively. 

I learned that it’s healthy to be open about how you are feeling. This had happened during a time in my life that I was extremely stressed. I was in a new city in a place where I barely knew anyone with a job that I was struggling with at the time. Me being the macho man that I am didn’t want to admit how I was feeling and played it off as nothing. But even the strongest men have weaknesses and mine caught up with me that night.  

The first thing I did the next morning was call my mom and we talked about what I was going through and created steps I needed to take to bounce back. Having a plan when life isn’t working is critical. I was at a low point and needed to make changes. 

That brings me to another lesson that night taught me. Having support is key in building and maintaining emotional health. We need people in our lives that can speak truth over us like my mom did that night. If you’re reading this and feel like you need someone then reach out to me. I’ve had times where I felt isolated and nobody needs that. You’re not alone. 

But the biggest thing I learned that night is the community you keep is a major factor in the level of emotional health you maintain. If you only have people in your life who take and never give, or isolate yourself and don’t let anyone in, then you’re destined to hit rock bottom and it’s never an enjoyable place to be. 

I guess my point of this is to say you are loved, people want to support you if you let them, and there’s always an escape from the hole you’re in no matter how deep it seems. I love you all.

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